//Mudvayne are serial killers// Pretend with me// They use telekinses or witchcraft to break into people and by usuing voodoo and degrading words they make people kill themselves// Now also pretend God is talking through me through books// I have a code worked out which I will explain along the way refereing to sentneces and other things I find in day to day life//Thats what this website is supposed to be about// Also Im becoming an escort, so I will write about that too//
//”Every day assholes came in and leered at her body, thats what motherfucking happened”//All of them look at my body and make comments//Two R’s, the R’s stand for Ryan Martini//One U, which points out a sentence directly too me//From book Beautiful Children by Charles Bock Pg.150, First sentence//
//”Twenty dollar bills or not, this dork had followed her clam around the room the way a trained show dog follows a treat”//R’s (again) stand for Ryan Martini//J Mann is also signified in this sentence but I forget how//The twenty dollar bills is reffereing to the time when I was a twenty dollar hooker//So cheap because I was on drugs, but niow that Im sober (except for alchohol and weed) I plan to become an actual escort, who make at least 250 and hour//This sentence is also from Charles Bock’s book Beautiful Children//
Filed under: Christ, God, Saint Therese | Tags: Bad Thoughts, God, Help, Saint Therese
Today I had a psychologist appointment, on my way out there I thought of another Demon Hunter song (I listen to them alot). It says “You soaked your heart in gasoline, now light it up and burn” .I thought how terrible it would be if someone did that, then one of the voices said “Lighten Up”. Just as they said that I saw a picture of Christ, the one thats kind of a joke…where he’s pointing and smiling like “Hey!” all cheerful. So maybe Christ wants me to lighten up?
We also drove by Saint Therese’s park, I never noticed it before. She’s Our Lady of Perpetual Help, so I should thank her…as I am getting perpetual help!
On the way back home, to the bus, I remembered one day when I asked God to teach me to war because of the situation with THEM. That day I went out running to try and receive this back…I did have some fun running around and playing, but decided killing them would be a poor solution to the problem and murderous. While it did go through my mind, I realize its an ugly thought and wouldn’t be the right course of action. When I went to the bus stop there was a dead bird, I placed it off the sidewalk and onto the grass. Was it meaningful that it was there? Since nothing is coincidence.
Saw another Egyptian sign that reminded me of the story Moses and Pharaoh when some of THEM were bothering me. I also saw a sign that said recognition is the greatest motivator. I thought about running to get myself in shape, and latter that day saw a sign about commit to be fit.
Walking from the bus I took home to my house, I realized I couldnt keep control with all the demons fighting me on my own and blessed God for the help. Just then two birds flew over my head. Two more birds flew over my head when I thanked God for the outfit I was wearing. I then noticed a rock by the road and sat upon it, which symbolized to me that when I trust in God nothing I cant bear will befall me. As I was walking further the wind blew a gate open which reminded me of these two facts…
The Archangel Michael is the closest to the Lord in the Jewish scriptures, for his very name means “Like Unto God.” As the eldest Archangel, he is given captaincy of all of God’s natural phenomena, including rain, wind, fire, snow, thunder, lightning, and hail. Michael is believed by many Jews to have appeared to Moses as the fire in the burning bush and to have led Daniel from the lions’ den.
Matthew 7:7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:
8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
9 Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone?
10 Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?
11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?
The only other things I did today was eat, take a bath, go to the store for some frappichino’s and make a new webpage layout. Its up in the “cute” section at my website.
Today was a great day. A lot of things happened besides THEM (the witches and sorcerers I hear, who I will refer to as THEM or THEY) being mean to me.
Mom and Allen grilled out and invited some people. Before they arrived I walked around outside for a while. The sun and shade was indescribably beautiful. Have you ever noticed the sun get brighter and darker, I mean really noticed it. How the sun just seems to spill from the sky on the grass and trees.
Julie and her boyfriend came over. They explained to me how to cook steak, while Allen and Mom grilled the food. While we were eating Chrissy came over. Later when everyone had left, and it was just Mom, Chrissy, and I…I saw a cloud that looked like a girl with Chrissy’s hairstyle and a demonic looking thing coming from her feet. Chrissy did have on painful looking shoes. Then another cloud looked kind of like a fish, so I asked her to go to church with me. As Christ said…”and I will make you fishers of men”, she said she would think about it.
A little bit later I stepped on a thorn right in the area Christ was pierced, then Mom told me to put a book up on the bookshelf. When I put up the book, I glanced right at a book titled “Atonement”. It wasn’t a coincidence. As a matter of fact, I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe everything is plotted and planned by God. Coincidences in my life are just ways God helps me deal with what I’m going through.
Later today I played with some kids on the playground…my elbows are still sore from diving down the slide. It was a lot of fun. We played a little volleyball, did cartwheels, and messed around on the equipment. We even played basketball with the volleyball. I talked to the three boys, I actually like kids more than adults. They are innocent and not as complicated. For a while I felt like the real me, not the me I don’t even recognize.
I did fall though, and I think the voices tripped me…because it was for no reason. I felt a pressure on my ankle and just went down…it hurt a little, but I got back up and kept playing.
Tonight I will probably read or work on my theology course at Christiancourses.com. Tomorrow I am going to church, so that will be cool. All in all today was a good day, the voices were talking but I didn’t let them get to me.
